When Crop Circles Go Bad – CoverUps.com
Pictured above is what some ufologists are calling a “Crop Circle Dud,” a mysterious crop circle that seemed to “die on the diameter,” so to speak. Whichever group of aliens made this one, or attempted to make it, appear to have a bad crop circle maker. If anything, they were ripped off and should immediately return that bum crop maker for a better one, claim some scientists.
By "Scratch" De Reno
CoverUps.com InvestigatorSOUTHHAMPTON, England – Once again, more mishapen crop circles have appeared all over the English Countryside causing some ufologists to question the competence of the alien’s making such shoddy circles on the countryside.
Dave Chorley of Cropcircles.org, who is dedicated to the explanation of Crop Circles and understanding the deeper meaning of The Simpson’s cartoon, said this shitty circle may indeed constitute the worst crop circle ever. Whatever half-assed alien was responsible should frankly be ashamed, he told CoverUps.com.
“Crop Circles, if nothing else, are beautiful testaments to the intricacies and geometrical mystery and symmetry of our multidimensional universe,” he told CoverUps.com. “However, every so often I guess they throw up a dud and this was a bad one… I would be ashamed if I was an alien and I made this crap circle. I can imagine Homer Simpson yelling ‘D’oh!’ after making this one.”
“John” an alien from Alpha Centauri, who chose not to use his real name, said it was indeed the work of an alien amateur that should not have been given a crop circle license.
“Frankly, I would like to apologize for this bullshit,” he confessed to CoverUps.com. “These aliens have taken much pride throughout the millennium of leaving little clues as to the greater complexity of the university for you primitive Earthlings… I think you have come to deserve much better than this… Frankly, as an alien, this is something I'm ashamed of…If I were them, I would have put a big rock over it our at least something else to hide it…”
Chorley agreed. “I don’t know what to say… They really crapped the bed on this one. There is nothing too mysterious about it…. It must have been amateur night.”
On a curious note, our alien confidante said that most crop circle making saucers are usually stocked with a couple bags of Scott’s Shade Mix, in the event of a rare dud. We asked the alien what Earthlings should do if more uneven circles start appearing.
Clearly despondent, he shrugged, “Use a lot of mulch, I guess.”
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