Giant Spiders From Germany - CoverUps.com

Big news in the Desert: CoverUps.com teamed up with the CIA to obtain secret photos of an underground co-op that is extorting giant German spiders and importing them into the South-Western United States, particularly California, in hopes they will serve as a successful population control mechanism.

As the population continues to soar in the South-West, the government grows more frantic in their search for funds and methods to support the vast populations, particularly in areas of high growth rate indexes like CA, AZ, NM, and NV. In a desperate attempt to curb population growth the U.S. government conducted secret negotiations with the remaining underground Nazi regime and purchased 100,000 oversized giant German spiders (rumor has it that these overgrown arachnids are the result of secret experiments started by Adolf Hitler).

Top secret CIA photo of a giant German spider on the run in California.

Though their bite isn't fatal to a full grown adult, it is venomous and renders one extremely ill for several days, prompting immediate dismissal from work until one can recuperate. Obviously, this conspiracy smacks of ill planning. With the prospects of people becoming ill and left to recuperate in bed, it seems the government has only goaded the temptation to stay at home instead of going to work. In the end this looks like it will actually cost the government A LOT more than if they had just left it alone.

Another giant German spider on the loose, in Nevada.

However, if you do come across one of the giant nemeses, CoverUps.com advises you to run straight to the East Coast where you can further crowd their small city limits.